Oh No You're Not! Not without:
Genuine Robbie the Robot talking Geiger Counter ("Danger, Will Robinson! Don't eat that canned-good!" You can even substitute your name!) Water Purifier Air Purifier Food Purifier Blood Purifier Amazingly light lead suit with special UV visor! (One size fits all!) Skin Burn cream/patches Microscope & slides - see your cells mutating! Booklet: Mutations to Expect & What to Do About Them (with color illustrations.) 2 months freeze-dried rations, just like the ones used by astronauts in 1969! ( For good reason!) Copy of Dr. Strangelove: Or, How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the A-Bomb. (VCR not included) Pamphlet: Why Should You Want to Survive WWIII? Plus Much, Much More! Don't be caught in a nuclear inferno without this kit! Not a toy! Experts say this kit may increase survival (out of direct range of atomic blast) by as much as 3%! Won't your friends be green with envy (not to mention radiation sickness) when they see you tooling around town in your radiation suit, prepared for whatever fallout the future may bring! You'll be able to say "Look Who's Laughing Now!" Don't wait till your phone melts! Call Now! (Johnny Atomic® is a trademark of Plutonium Playdough, Inc. All rights reserved.)
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